Tuesday, 28 June 2011

A bald, bold new look

Just went to the barbers yesterday and frankly, I'm wondering whether to bother much longer. Once, there were scissors, wax, gel, layers and shampooing and sensual combing of long silken locks and now it's about 30 seconds with a pair of clippers and a bit of tweaking around the ears.

Soon there'll be nothing to do but give it a polish.

Which got me thinking, we should not be ashamed of our folically challenged-ness-ness, we should celebrate it!

So, today's blog is to applaud the bad, the bald, the beautiful. And the not so much.

1. Blofeld. Back in the day when Connery was Bond and Donald Pleasance first appeared from behind his Ayran henchman and declared "You only live twice, Mr. Bond." Check it out on YouTube, gives me chills even now. A look often immitated, but never equalled. Yes, I do mean Dr.Evil. And seriously, what a work ethic. Base in a hollowed out volcano, world conquest, pirahna fish tank. While Bond is there lying back in his silk sheets with some blonde, Blofeld is out there, taking on the Man. Respect.

2. Thuggee Boss Man, above. Mola Ram. Enslaves children, tears hearts out from innocent locals, tosses Kate Capshaw down into a volcano and heads up the greatest assassin cult in history. And check out that tiger tooth necklace! Now I know necklaces for men are the newest metro-sexual thing but seriously, amber or those silly little beads? If you're going to wear jewellry, as a bloke, it's got to make a statement and nothing says 'BAD-ASS' like a necklace of tigers' teeth. I've no doubt Mola Ram ripped those teeth out with his own hands. So, repeat after me, "Kali Maa! Kali Maa!"

3. Colonel Kurtz. Apocalypse Now is one of the few films I can see time and time again. Especially the Bunny-girl bit. But there's so much more to it than inappropriate dancing on a helicopter! It's a quest movie, like The Hobbit but less so on the dragons and dwarves and more on the napalm (which apparently smells like victory) and blowing up villages. Which, come to think of it, is what happens in The Hobbit too! Wow, never saw that connection. I think I might blog on that later. Still, Kurtz. Out in the jungle, a man might lose perspective. Hey, haven't you been on holiday, got off the beaten track and just decided to set yourself up as a despot ruler of a bunch of jungle dwelling natives? No? Maybe it's just me then.

Till next time folks.


elizabethfais said...

Are you forgetting Bruce Willis? Mr. BadAss himself? Bald is in!

elizabethfais said...

Are you forgetting Bruce Willis, Mr. Badass himself? Bald is in!